In the drug enhanced story of Passover, the Jews eat matzoh because they don't need carbohydrates. This is due to the fact that they are snorting coke, which suppresses appetite. You THINK they get that emaciated look from slavery, but we all know drugs are the best diet of all.
The Ten Plagues were the product of a mass hallucination, courtesy of those Egyptian worship cults. Logically, the Angel of Death had to have been a fancy name for a coma. Note how it sounds similar to "Angel Dust," the street name for PCP. I think we all know what the first born children were REALLY doing that night.
The lamb's blood is the mystery liquid on the floor of the elevator lobby at the college of your choice on a Saturday night. Then all of the Egyptians overdose and blame it on the Jews. The end.
Morbid Passover humor: Makat b'chorot, Death of the First Born, had the Pharaoh's son in...stitches! Because the Egyptians would have mummified him! It's the original dead baby joke! :D
And on that note, I have to go help make Passover dinner. Hey, maybe I'll actually get to wear a yarmulke at the Seder this year, which is a head covering that Jewish men wear on religious occasions. But my parents, being the Jews that they are, ordered the GENERIC cartoonist instead of the name brand one when I was born, because it wouldn't cost as much. He ended up drawing me all wrong.
See what I did there? I blamed my parents, and the Jews! :D
AHAHAHAHAHA.
Have a happy Passover, everyone.
